What do you think? is this the duct tape bandit baby?

Thanks Meatdrawer for the clip...now go do some work!

Monday Rap Out

Ten People on TV I want to stab in the eye!

Here is a list ive done a lot of thinking about. There are so many people on TV that either really know what their doing and are bad at it, or are just plain annoying. I have come up with a list of ten people on TV that I regularly see, that if given the chance, would snap my 6 iron and stab them with the sharp ends in both eyes. If anyone can come up with other people to add, please feel free. This can be therapeutic by venting on the folks we must watch but would rather not.

1) Dick Vitale - As far as sportscasters go, this guy nudges the legendary Mel Kiper Jr. out as most annoying. PTP'ers, Awesome with a capital A, diaper dandy, Duke is all class, etc etc, this big mouth torments us all each March. Bob Knight in the booth has been awesome, much better then his horse throated nitwit.
2) Tom Messner - Why smile all the time? It could be -15 with a 3 ft storm coming yet this little ass clown smiles about it. His ego is so big his little green screen is called the super 5000 doppler radar. The fuck? I think if one of his teeth were missing he'd be easier to watch.
3) Tom Bergeron - This jerk hosts American Funny Videos. Why does this show need a host? Its videos, play them and leave it alone. Only good part of this show is he always has some teenage talent with a big rack in the front row.
4) Rachel Ray - Too much! I cant watch anything without her on it. I know, she can cook, but she's loud and arrogant, kinda like me. Ill take me some Giada anyday. YUMMO!
5) Billy Mays - This hack is always on infomercials and during late night selling crap like OxyClean, and junk like that. He reminds me of Bluto on the old Popeye shows. Get a real job Billy..and since when are 50 year old men named Billy? Why not Bill or William?
6) JJ Cioffi - For 20 yearth thith guy has thlurred the thporth on thee b s newth. He cant read a teleprompter for shit, and is obviously a lousy Yankee fan. Not to mention I had to golf with him a couple years ago..BRUTAL!
7) Flavor Flav - This will come to a surprise to many of you. I grew up on Public Enemy, however this cat is 50 years old, still yelling his name 400 times a day, and dressing like a fool. Not to mention, he has failed at scoring the right chick 3 times now. Time to move on Foofie Foofie.
8) Chef Tony - Apparently this "chef" has a set of miracle blades that he hawks on TV. Ill tell you this, I wouldnt eat a thing this guy made, he looks like he got his name as a prison cook. However, he's won awards for best pitchman in America. I thought the best Pitch man won the Cy Young award?
9) Dr. Phil - I know I know, he helps people. But my gosh this guy goes too far, telling people to "read my book" and go to "my 4909 reasons" to get your life in order. Something tells me that if we dug deep into his past, he was either a child molester, meth addict, polygamist, klan member, or something.
10) Tim McCarver - Fox sports would do America a favor by firing this dimwit. Not only a lover of A-Rod and Jeter, the mouth gets the details of the game wrong constantly. For instance last year in the playoffs he called Josh Becketts changeup a screwball. However, Beckett does not throw a changeup! McCarver is becoming more senile by the inning, and his lecturing tends to make the average fan feel like they have never watched baseball before.

This is how happy I am to go back to days!

Picture me dancing and singing along to this for about 5 weeks straight, cause since I heard this ive had it stuck in my head!

The Rocket is back on days!! ROCK OUT!

POKER NIGHT!!! TIME TO GET SOME FUCKIN CARDS

Tonight will be the one of the only non snow nights at poker night? Does this change in weather mean a change in my luck? I doubt it, but im feeling lucky!!!

Some interesting comments by Lacey during today's game

"Wow, lot of Asian people in the crowd huh?"

"Now batting, Jurio Rugo"

Manny saves the day!

Opening day, Dice K sucked, Ortiz sucked, Papelbon really sucked. JD Drew's pussy hurt, BUT...Manny, 2 huge 2 run doubles, Brandon Moss, game tying dinger and an RBI single. Bryan Corey and Okajima were impressive. Great run saving plays by Lugo in the 2nd, and Ellsbury in the 7th. What a catch that was!!! All in all, an up and down day, but its only March 25th. Manny sure has that cadillac pose in mid season form! The magic number is 162!

Best Baseball Anthems- Crowd pumpers

Alright folks, in honor of MLB kicking off another season, here is a compilation of videos of songs played in stadiums across the country.
- The Guitar player here looks like Randy Johnson!!

2008 Opening day - Tomorrow live from Japan!

While most people will be getting ready for work at 6 am, the Boston Red Sox open their quest for a repeat World Series season. I like our team again, there are a couple questions early on, but these things shake themselves out pretty quickly (remember Pedroia last year?) Anyhow, I predict 97 wins and another strong playoff run.

The lineup
Jacoby Ellsbury - CF - ROY Favorite right now, can he hold up all year?
Kevin Youkilis - 1B - Gold glove, .300 hitter, best goatee and heaviest sweater in baseball.
Big Papi - DH - Primed for another huge season.
Manny - LF - ready to prove last season's decline in numbers was a joke.
JD Drew - RF - great post season, great preseason so far, We'll SEE!!!!
Mike Lowell - 3B - World series MVP, new contract, I expect a huge year!
Tek - C - Right now arguably the best captain in pro sports.
Dustin Pedroia - 2B - 07 ROY, hard nosed player, a bit of a moron, but fits right in here.
Julio Lugo - SS - What got lost in his season was the 80 RBI's and solid defense.

The Rotation/Bullpen
Josh Beckett - Not in Japan, but should be just fine. 20 wins??
Dice K - A full year in the bigs under his belt, I suspect he will be like Beckett was last year...
Tim Wakefield - 15 or so wins, eats a ton of innings, and a leader in the clubhouse.
Jon Lester - Completely healthy, now's the time to see his potential!
Clay Buchholz - Until Schilling/Colon is ready, the no hitter phenom should fit in nicely here.

Papelbon - closer - enough said
Timlin - DL to start, but still solid at times
Manny Delcarmen - getting better and better every year, should set up a ton of games.
Hideki Okajima - All star in 07, should be steady once again.
Yo Yo Tavarez - can start, finish, mop up, and of course keep the crowd entertained.

Special Sunday rap out- just cause I like these 2 songs

The Razor Winners Unite!

Highlights of the night include:
-Drek pussing out to hang with Gabbott
-Learning what a brass bonanza is.
-Bomber telling Lacey to answer him or else he will give her a "glazed donut"
-Crocker, from Boston sending me a picture of a tit on my phone.
-BBBB following Bacchi downtown while the rest of us went to Essex
-Mixies at Park Place
-Seeing Crocker at Pearl St. Pub for "a quick one" at 2 am! This after he drove from BETHEL!!!!!!
-Apparently having pictures taken of me with the razor while im passed out.
-The story of Rassel being asked to leave Pearl St. Pub and then seeing his fat lip this morning.

All in all, about what you would expect from the golden razor winners.

Great songs...gay videos!

This compilation is of some great songs, at least in my eyes, that have the worst or gayest videos you can imagine...Although the 3rd one might just be the coolest thing ever on stage. Enjoy!

Its Friday...Rock out

IS this a waste of my time?

Due to the lack of comments and remarks I get on this blog of mine, I wonder, is it read? Is this not user friendly? Is there something I should be putting on here, or NOT putting on here? I would like some feedback as to whether this is mildly entertaining, or just a waste of my time. I dont want to look like Guy LeDouche up there if I dont have to....So please let me know if its a waste of my time to put these silly things up here or not! Its quite easy...click where it says 0 comments, then up top youll see a blue hotlink that says Post a comment on Rocket's Daily blastoff. Click on that if you want to make a comment, if not, ill feel like Guy!!

There is no crying in baseball!

The Red Sox - my team..bitched and whined until they got their way..Now they are on the way to Japan for some sake, kobe beef, and hopefully 2 wins against the A's...

Its March Madness time...28 days of Dick Vitale

Here we go, get your brackets, highlighters, ballpoint pens, blackberrys, whatever it takes. Its March Madness baby! PTP'ers, diaper dandys baby!!! Its going to be Awesome with a capital A!!! Dick Vitale losing his voice and talking about how super, scintillating and sensational every one is. Oh yeah, he packs it to Duke also...

Scuba's prediction? UNC over Memphis in the finals...

Mad Bomber...hoop hater as well!

Wow...Bomber not only hates hoop...but also likes to stereotype! nice work!!!

"The point is .. that it shouldn't be !!
Basketball is the p*(ssiest sport there is.
Watching a bunch of 300 lb black guys
play stuff the big ball through the hoop
then whine because somebody touched them
should only be shown on the Jail cell
security screens..."

Lacey, your reply to this?????

Benny Big Balls...being a whine ass!

After suggesting a team meeting at the Pour House to watch the Hockey East Frozen 4 and March Madness..here was his non Golden Razor award winning type reply.

"I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE WHERE THERE IS F*ING MARCH MADNESS ON! I CAN'T STAND THAT FOOLISH F*ING S* SHOW! STUPID F*ING BRACKETS AND STUPID F*ING ESPN WASTED COVERAGE! GOD THIS TIME OF YEAR ANGERS ME FOR THAT ONE REASON ALONE! It is F*ing hoopty-hoop ball. Why the F* can't they get the entire tournament done and over with in one weekend on one street court somewhere???"

And of course...Lacey has to come up with an inappropriate response..

"BBB says he isn't going anywhere where there is march madness on?!?!?! then he better put on his pj's and have his mommy heat him some spaghetti-o's to eat on the couch because march madness will be on EVERYWHERE"

Is Snoop Dogg broke? Why must he create garbage?

Why does the Doggfather feel compelled to put out shit like this? What happened to the Deep Cover sound, the gangsta sound? The 1,2,3 and to the 4 stuff? This shit sucks!!!

Monday Rap Out..early cause I dont roll on St. Pattys!

The last one is to get the bootys shaking!

Lacey's inappropriate comment of the weekend

In the 4 years i've known you, that is the grossest thing i've ever seen you do, and i've seen you poop! - in reference to me mock smelling women's underwear in the store.

Irish band Rock out - Special posting for St. Pattys!

Lacey's mouth!

Funny one today..

"You know what i'm giving up for lent this year? LENT!"

Friday - Rock out

ALWAYS..keep your eye on the ball

http://www.thewvsr.com/bodypaint.htm

So long Mr. Patriot!

In other sporting news..

Not only did Mirabelli get his walking papers, it appears the Troy Brown area as Mr. Patriot has ended. The franchise leader in catches, yards, punt return yards, interceptions and forced fumbles by a receiver, not to mention making more big plays then anyone in franchise history led by example for 16 years. I truly believe this guy belongs in the HOF, but at least deserves his number retired immediately!!

The Doug Mirabelli era is OVER!

Red Sox release catcher Mirabelli
Surprise move opens door for Cash to assume backup role
By Ian Browne / MLB.com

FORT MYERS, Fla. -- In a move that was somewhat surprising, the Red Sox parted ways with Doug Mirabelli, putting the veteran backup catcher on unconditional release waivers before Thursday's exhibition game against the Tampa Bay Rays.

Mirabelli's top strength in recent years was his uncanny ability to handle Tim Wakefield's knuckleball.

In fact, aside from the first month of 2006 season -- when Mirabelli spent a short-lived stint with the San Diego Padres -- he had been handling Wakefield since the 2002 season.

Mirabelli was supposed to start for the Red Sox in Thursday's game, but was scratched about an hour before game time, leading to rampant speculation that he was on his way out. That speculation proved to be correct.

Dusty Brown replaced Mirabelli behind the plate for Bartolo Colon's Grapefruit League debut.

Though there has been no word from the Red Sox yet on a contingency plan, Kevin Cash would seem to be the favorite to replace Mirabelli. When Mirabelli went on the disabled list in August of last season, Cash caught Wakefield for three starts and did a solid job.

The Red Sox re-signed Cash to a Minor League deal during the offseason.

A right-handed hitter, Mirabelli was traded to the Red Sox on June 12, 2001, after starting catcher Jason Varitek had fractured his right elbow.

In the ensuing years, Varitek and Mirabelli formed a relationship that was close both on and off the field.

Mirabelli, once an occasional threat at the plate, declined sharply from an offensive standpoint over the last few seasons.

In 2007, Mirabelli hit .202 with five homers and 16 RBIs in 114 at-bats.

The 37-year-old Mirabelli has played in 566 games in his career, hitting .231 with 58 homers and 206 RBIs.

A free agent over the winter, the Red Sox re-signed Mirabelli to a one-year deal worth $550,000. Mirabelli had played in six games this spring, hitting .273 with one RBI in 11 at-bats.

--While this isnt COMPLETELY surprising, its time to cut bait and move on. This guy was a great clubhouse guy (ala Millar, Nixon) there comes a time when the skill just isnt cutting it, and when this guy plays, its an easy out 3 times a game. But kudos to Dougie, 2 rings, a memorable police escort to Fenway, and 6 years as a specialty player. Who gets the role now?? Kevin Cash? George Brouillette?? I mean Kottaras?? Or downtown Dusty Brown?

Poker night returns!

Poker night is back after a one week "sick" sabbatical. Lets hope the degenerates wont play stupid and the Rocket can take home some money! Last game was a 2nd and 3rd place finish, not bad for 12 handed...

Lacey's mouth again

"Ooh, looks like Mr. Facebook 08 is a fucking scholar, he's well versed in the English language!" -this was after some British guy on Food network said cumulation instead of culmination. Apparently im Mr. Facebook 2008 in her eyes as well. Its better then looking at porn!

Shake what you got in them jeans!

What a great beat and video!!! This is so much better then back that thang up!!!

Sweden gives India a run for worst music!

First Abba, then Ace of Base, and also this rubbish. Sweden puts out great hockey players (Forsberg, Sundin, Lundqvist, Salming) and great golfers (Sorenstam, Stenson), but my gosh the music this country puts out is TERRIBLE. The only tolerable song ive ever heard to come from Sweden is the Final Countdown. Enjoy this crap, and thanks again Kidder!!

Lacey is moving slow today..she had a hot pocket for lunch

Enough said!

The worst video ever!

Thanks to Kidder, we now know that music in India sucks..along with the food and the pollution.

Monday...lets rap! - Old and new school

The Rocket is going to NJ!

Thats right, cue the orange tan spray and Jagerbombs, the Rocket will be going after the Golden Razor in NJ on May 2. I find it hard to believe people actually tolerate this look without absolutely beating the shit out of these people. If I looked like this id have to kick my own ass!

Rock Out - Its Friday!!

NBA reinstates Chris Andersen

So this wastoid that goes by the "Birdman" has officially been reinstated to the NBA after a 2 year hiatus for repeatedly violating the drug policy. First of all, look at this dude, he looks like the real Jackie Moon in Semi-Pro. You have to know this guy hits the hippie lettuce. Im all for second chances and what not, but jeez, if this guy was bombed enough to get a 2 yr ban, why let him back? Does this open the door in other sports for morons like Adam Jones (he's NOT PACMAN by the way, I respect Pac-Man!) to be reinstated cause they toe the line for a while? I say keep his ass banned, let him play in Turkey if he wants to play.

How real does this look?

Someone thought it would be cute to wear a baby bump and try on pregnant clothes, how amusing!!!

HOLY CRAP - #4 retires

So long to the best QB ever! Screw Marino, Elway, Montana, yeah some of these guys won more, but when you talk about tough, Favre set the bar. Played 250+ straight games. At friggen quarterback!!! This record is untouchable! Not to mention the 400+ touchdowns, countless 4th quarter comebacks. Even though I dislike the Packers, it was fun watching this guy play! Go relax, Brett, put your wranglers on and have a cold one, youve earned it.

Lacey's inappropriate comment of the day!

"Collins Perley skating club, aka BFA Hockey" - when watching the news and they were featuring some 6 yr old girls in tutu's skating around. NOT COOL! We have 15 boys banners and 6 chick banners. I dont see Randolph Union's hockey team raising any banners!

Holy Crap!! White people CAN dance

Contrary to popular belief, the white man can dance!!!

I had this crap stuck in my head all weekend, you should too!!

Its Monday - rap out!!!!

The Golden Razor is properly displayed!

Benny Big Balls sent me his display case from New Hampshire, and wanted everyone to know its on full display for all his fans and groupies that wish to admire his 2008 Golden Razor victory!